Teaching Kids Gratitude
Children are not born understanding appreciation. KEY POINTS “I want that fire truck,” screams 3-year-old William, and he proceeds to throw himself prostrate on the floor in the store. Mom is beside herself. She has already bought him three toys since they’ve been out shopping. She worries: “Is he spoiled? Is he a bad kid?” […]
Why Kids Whine
Tips for how to resolve a child’s whining KEY POINTS “Stop whining!” Parents will plead with their kids. It’s hard to hear your child drone on and on, “I want some ice cream,” when you’re walking down the street, or “He hit me” from the backseat of the car. Parents can get very irritated, especially […]
This Sexual Behavior Is Part of Natural Development
Four-year-old Grace is lying on the couch in the living room with her hand in her pants. Mom and Dad are very uncomfortable and are not sure what to do. On one hand, their discomfort makes them feel like yelling at her to stop. (Sometimes, this has to do with early childhood associations or prohibitions.) At the same time, […]
Should Parents Apologize?
KEY POINTS Many parents tell me that they feel overwhelming guilt after yelling at their children. They remember how badly they felt as children when their parents screamed at them and had even sworn to themselves that they would never do this as a parent. I commiserate with these parents by acknowledging that parenting is one of the hardest […]
Age Gap: When to Have a Second Child
Large or small, age gaps affect sibling relationships Parents often wonder about whether it’s better to have their children close in age or spaced far apart. Some will say: “Oh let’s just get it over with. We’ll be finished with the diapers and bottles all at once.” So they decide to have one child right […]
Overcoming Parental Guilt
Parenting is the hardest job in the world Many parents tell me that they feel overwhelming guilt after yelling at their child. They remember how badly they felt as children when their parents yelled at them, and had even sworn to themselves that they would never do this as a parent. I commiserate with these parents by […]
How Parental Birth Order Affects Parenting
Identifying with your child A parent’s birth order powerfully impacts his relationship with his children. If a parent was the firstborn child, he may identify completely with his oldest. He understands this child best because they have had many of the same experiences. The parent knows what it’s like to have younger siblings who are always taking […]
Raising Twins
Encourage their unique identities There are many benefits for children growing up as twins. The children always have a playmate whether they’re playing dress-up together, or just lying on their beds reading. They’re never alone. Their interests are usually similar because they’re at the same developmental stage, and so is their sense of humor. And they enjoy getting into […]
The Only Child
Are you demanding too much of your only child? Four-year-old Julie is walking down the street hand-in-hand with her mom and dad. “One, two, three everyone counts,” when they arrive at a curb—and her parents swing her onto the sidewalk. “Did you see how high I jumped?” Julie asks excitedly. “Oh, Julie! That was wonderful,” […]
Middle Child Syndrome
Overcoming the challenge of being both an older and younger sibling all at once The family is sitting around the dinner table. Daddy is having a discussion with his 12-year-old son about which high school he would like to attend. Mommy is busy cutting up their 3-year-old’s chicken and vegetables. Suddenly, 7-year-old Nicole flings a forkful of […]